An Urban Twist to Quondam Phrases

An Urban Twist to Quondam Phrases

(We are familiar with several of these idio (ma) tic, short, pithy expressions; but some of these modern phraseologies seem to go overboard when the city bred use them! (Contributions from my....local......... Ivy League).
A.
Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.
A penny saved is ridiculous
All's well that ends.
B.
Be different, act normal.
By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
C.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Conscience: What hurts when everything else feels so good?
D.
Drive defensively -- buy a tank.
Dinner is ready when the smoke alarm goes off.
Double your drive space - delete Windows!
E.
Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...........
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
E = mc^2 +- 3db
F.
Famous Last Words: "Hey! This really is a bottomless pit!!!"
Formula for success: Under-promise and over-deliver. -Tom Peters
Friends come and go but enemies accumulate.
G.
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
Going the speed of light is bad for your age.
H.
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
Hard work may not kill me, but why take chances.
He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.
History is an inaccurate narration of what ought not to have happened.
I.
I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
I may get older but I refuse to grow up!
I'll have to think twice about it before I give it a second thought.
I'm so poor, I can't even pay attention!
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.
J.
Journalism is merely history's first draft. -Geoffrey C. Ward
Jumping to conclusions can be a bad exercise
K.
Knock. If the doors don't open, the bell may not be working.
L.
Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
Life is what happens to you while you are making other plans.
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
M.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Make sure brain is in gear before engaging mouth.
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
N.
No job is so simple that is can't be done wrong.
No question is so difficult as one to which the answer is obvious.
No sooner said the better.
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself
O.
One thing is certain. If you can laugh at your troubles, you will always have something to laugh at.
Only adults have difficulty with childproof bottles.
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
P.
Photons have mass? I didn't know they were Catholic!
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
Press ESC once to quit, twice to continue...
Q.
Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research.
R.
Reality is just another point of view.
Reality's the only obstacle to happiness.
Reputation: what others are not thinking about you.
S.
Simplicity is the beginning of all thing complicated.
Success comes in a can. Failure comes in a can not.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Survey said: Three out of four people make up 75% of the population.
T.
Take my advice, I'm not using it.
The chief cause of problems is solutions.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that there is a limit to genius.
The highway of life is always under construction
The ideal resume will turn up one day after the position is filled.
The meek shall inherit the earth - - - - they are too weak to refuse.
The trouble with doing nothing is that you never know when you are finished.
There are three types of people -- those who can count, and those who can't.
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
U.
Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.
V.
"Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
"Vu Ja De" - the feeling that you've never been anywhere.
V V R? What’s that Very Verbose Rabelaisian doing in a place like this?
W.
When all else fails, read the instructions.
When everyone agrees with me, I know I'm wrong.
When in doubt, do as doubters do.
When the going gets tough, everybody leaves.
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
X.
'Xcess of anything is bad except cash.
Y.
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
You get the most of what you need the least.
You never find a lost article until you replace it.
Z.
Zipping though the traffic is a distant dream even while playing computer games.

Ciao
V V R
13th Dec 007