THRISSUR THAATHY AND DVAMDVATVA

THRISSUR THAATHY AND DVAMDVATVA
(This I dedicate to the Senior citizens of the group whose vision and experience combine to form beacons (maargadarshini) to guide the next-gen and future generations of the forum)

If by philosopher we mean one who acts calmly and rationally in the affairs and changes of life, well I knew one closely. She hailed from Palghat but spent better part of her married life in Tiruvambaadi, Thrissur just close to the Krishnan Temple. No wonder she had Lord Krishna residing in her heart all the time and in every breath. If you found her absolutely unruffled and happy all the time you can’t blame her. She was merely living up to her name-“Aanantham”-for short.
“Otherwise my full name in the ration card”, she would chuckle “is Vaidyanaathapuram Venkiteswaran Ananthaambaal”
Though born in a pretty progressive family, she did not educate beyond 5th grade. This academic background, I was to learn later turned out perhaps to be her biggest asset. Mind you, her father was a “who is who” in that remote village! Popularly known as ‘M.A Venkitchu’ because of his post graduation, he rose to become the first Indian Principal of Maharaja College, Ernakulam. But then I am digressing. This is about Thrissur Thaathi and not about her father.
Having had no formal schooling or training of any sort, her mind remained unstained, fresh as a Lily, always receptive and ready to soak in all sorts of ideas. This academic background notwithstanding, she acquired varied skills through sheer personal efforts and interaction with people. Her forte? Mental Arithmetic, Sanskrit, Malayalam literature and Manipravaalam. Her managerial skills would have left many a modern day H R executive of B School origin astounded. She was at her best when the chips were down. I have often been struck by the coolness and aplomb displayed by her in emergencies. Her husband of Koduvayur origin was a teacher, an academician and ran a Typewriting Institute through the portals of which many a poor Brahmin boy udaranimittam has passed on his way to the then Bombay seeking employment having mastered the ‘halving principle’ of Pittman’s shorthand. He was Rama Iyer, a perfect match for that intellectual beauty, Aanantham in body and soul. They reared 3 sons and 3 daughters all to become later highly accomplished in their own fields.
My first encounter with Thrissur Thaathi was in early 1970 when she was aged 82. But she looked not a day older than 50. My wife introduced me to her. Thaathi had been widowed since quite some years then. There was an aura of genuine concern in her, as she enquired about me and my parents.
“I have heard such a lot about you Thaathi from my wife” I ventured.
“Don’t believe them” she said with a toothless benign smile.
Hours passed as we exchanged views on many topics. Then I shot her a question more in jest than seriousness. But the reply she gave was to have a great impact on my youthful mind.
“How come Thaathi you react differently from all of us even under stress? Your reaction to any difficult situation is as though you knew all the time that the crisis is coming- except for it timing”, I laughed
She, who swore by the Bhagawat Geetha merely said, “DVAMDVATVA” or the ability to support opposites”
“What is that Thaathi?” I got interested. The next few minutes she talked and I listened open mouthed. It went something like this.

“The Geeta is a treatise that has worn extraordinarily well, with all cross-sections of people. Each time we read, new meanings are evolved to our lives. One aspect referred to in every chapter is the existence of Dvamdvam (pairs of opposites) with a warning for all to live away from this realm of dualistic experiences by maintaining equipoise and balance of mind under all circumstances. Krishna draws Arjuna’s attention to this feature, time and again (figure inside the bracket shows the chapter number). Words like samaduhkhasukham (2), kritena akritena (3), karma akarma (4), nirdvandvah (5), sheetoshna (6) dvandvamohena (7), na dveshyah na priyah (8), shubha ashubha (9), aadi anth (10), sat asat (11), tulya nindasthuthihi (12), avibhaktham vibhaktham (13), maanapamaanayoho (14), dvandvevimuktha (15), pravirthimcha nivrithimcha (16), sidhyaasidhyoho (18) are suggestive of the world of ‘DVAMDVAM’. Thus, it would seem even sin has as much a place in this world as virtue, and like other pairs of opposites they also surround every one. Their presence cannot be questioned. It is in the nature of things for two quite opposite things to coexist. We have no alternative except to accept Dvamdvam as inevitable. But what we can do is to heed the repeated advice of the Lord to try and insulate ourselves from the influence of Dvamdvam and not get unsettled. If we achieve this even in small measure, we would be closer towards absolute freedom.
We get unwittingly trapped in a web of good and evil, virtue and vice leaving us ponder at the end of the day if we did well or evil not realizing that we had no role at all in the decision-making! We influence “nothing”, in the context of altering “nature of things”, in the total perspective of the universal canvas. Na eva kinchit karomi (Chap V, verse 8, Geetha) is the underlying principle (I do nothing at all). Nirmama Nirahamkrithah (Have no sense of “Mine” and “I”). If this principle is accepted, life becomes simple all of a sudden. If not, we become incapable of facing the challenges of life and meeting its rising demands. In our false estimate of things and beings, we tend to play out of tune with the whole orchestra of life. Let’s heed the advice of Krishna and keep away from the realm of pairs of opposites and become Dwamdva vimukthaah. Keeping our minds balanced in success and failure- (Sidhyaasidhyoho samam kuryaadh); let’s not lose our equipoise, even mindedness and balance of mind under any circumstances. As the future unfolds itself, let’s take life as it comes”, she had said.

It was Dec 1971. Indo-Pak Cease fire had been declared. My first child born in Mumbai was a few days old. An IAF aircraft was to fly all the way from Pathankot to Mumbai. And when I got a call from Mumbai saying Thrissur Thaathi was sinking I took that flight to be at her side at Nanavati hospital. When I held her hand I felt that I did not want to be anywhere else in this world. A few moments later she joined her husband at the heavenly abode. I controlled my self admirably because I knew she would not approve of my emotional outburst. “Be Dvandvavat”, she had said, a single word which became the underlying philosophy of my life. The only time I get a lump in my throat is when I hear her favourite song some time in the radio,
(Thetchi mandaaram tulasi picchaka poomaala chaarthi
Guruvaayurappa ninne kani kaanenam!)

How do I know about her so much you mean?
Well, she was my MIL’s MIL.
“You mean Mother-in-law’s Mother-in law?” you may ask.
“No. Mother-in-love’s Mother-in love” will be my answer.

Rgds

V V R
30th May 06.